Litigation at the Lowest Level

An Article by Ruth Nichols, OLT Reader

‘Mum just has to check out our public liability policy before you can come over!’

Perhaps such a reply to an innocent afternoon of play is still classed as a joke but this type of comment may soon be considered the ‘norm’ for our young ones.

Could it be that the cold hard fingers of today’s litigious world will begin to impact on Daycare or Preparatory School simplicity? Social correctness and fear of litigation already have parents questioning the appropriateness of their children’s basic interactions.

As a grandparent, I wonder how parents of today cope with navigating their children through the stormy waters of today’s society. With one in five Australian children surfing the net unsupervised before their sixth birthday, it is evident that attitudes to child rearing are widely different within households. Although, the fact that my five-year-old grandson can upload programmes onto the family computer gives me a cause for pride for I know he only learnt this by sitting beside his parents. Unsupervised, what will children learn? How can developing brains know the difference between using the computer as a tool and being used by it? How can they tell the difference between genuine friendship and manipulative play?

Parents have such a huge responsibility to allay the fears of their children. Instead of looking suspiciously at others, provide them with a variety of social situations – sports teams, clubs, hobbies and artistic endeavours – where they have the opportunity to deal with simple problems and learn from the experience.

Remember when young ones used to play outside till dark? That was when interactions between children were transparent, before innuendos could lead to recrimination. How to maintain that childhood simplicity today so that children are aware of the opportunities but not paranoid about the traps that lurk around every innocent play session? Fear breeds suspicion and insecurity; things that children should not have to face.

For sometimes while parents are trying to find the balance between work and home life, the issue of workplace health and safety comes sneakily into family life. As work becomes more stressful, therapy and lifestyle become intertwined. Children may be caught up in complicated, adult thinking that has the potential to destroy the naivety of an afternoon’s play.

A friend of mine was recently harried by an overzealous mother who was certain the school was negligent in what she considered to be a bullying issue.

‘Your son pushed my son over!’

‘The teacher on duty said that they were playing and another boy fell on my son from behind and he fell on your son’.

The result – a bleeding nose. Who is to blame? Even if lawyers are not involved, guilt and blame have been established. Children quickly pick up on an adult’s insecurities and suspicions. This could lead to sensitive children questioning their reactions with others and may be at risk of coming up with negative answers surrounding their suitability as a friend.

So what can a parent do to make their child’s interactions as effective as necessary in our complicated world? Perhaps this can be achieved by maintaining traditional values and making sure children feel secure – not through overprotecting but through developing their judgment about right and wrong.

For what sort of people will today’s Daycare generation grow into? Will they be focussed on self and self-advancement only at the expense of others? If they are taught to look with suspicion at their peers, is this the side of life they will see?

Already, today’s children are different from the X and Y generations. They think differently but have the capacity to achieve much if we can broaden their thinking beyond the restrictive parameters of fear and allow them guided opportunities for risk-taking. Instead of asking, ‘What will that do for me?’ before they do something, try asking, ‘Will what I do make it better?’

Article by Ruth Nichols

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